From the heart

I've been thinking a lot about how things are, and decided that now I'm more settled, a little less stressed and have more of an idea where I'd like things to head, I've gotta get off by butt and put all these ideas to work.

I've had a crappy couple of years since both my parents passed away, and it left a huge MASSIVE gaping hole on my life. I'm lucky that I'm married to kindest man I could ever wish for, and he is a complete rock. I love him more than words could ever explain.

My life was hectic and unscheduled, I was bumbling along from day to day just getting by. I hated that feeling. There was nothing I felt in complete control of, therefore I just let go. I managed to put on a whole stack of weight by just not caring. Simple as that. I didn't bloody well care! I didn't eat well, I didn't sleep well, I didn't do anything well! The family that I had left didn't want to know me after I told them a few home truths, and that hurt me. I became very angry and very low. I gave up exercising and curled into a big fat ball. I was on antidepressants, feeling a bit hopeless to be honest.

As time has passed by (almost 3.5 years), I've got used to the idea of having no blood family that gives a toss about what I do. I have great friends and my wonderful husband. I'm living in a house that is filled with precious memories of my late parents, I'm studying for my degree (which is nearly finished...yaaay!) and I've got so much to live for.

Time to get back in the driving seat.

I've just made the most delicious vegetable chilli, and am contemplating making applesauce muffins to take to work for breakfast (I always miss breakfast....too busy to sort it out!).

I've read a few blogs where people have lost a huge amount of weight, but I'm only looking at the first 7lbs at the moment. Any further than this might sabotage my efforts.

Bite sized goals are the way I'm tackling this, and I'll just have to be consistant (I'm crap at consistancy).

Lets just try one week of being consistant!!